All of us know how dreadful it is to grieve the loss of a loved one. Sometimes, it can make us do things we normally would never even consider doing. From pets to human loved ones, loss hits everyone differently. Most choose to use their grief to honor their loved one in some way, whether that’s memorializing them, scattering ashes, or working to change laws if they died due to something preventable.
Others express their grief online for others to see and find comfort in speaking to a counselor or others who have gone through the same situation. Still, grief knows no bounds, and one woman in the UK is causing controversy due to her plans to eat her mother’s ashes.
Debra Parsons plans to scatter her mother’s ashes over each part of her Christmas dinner and consume them this holiday in order to feel as though her mother is living on through her.
Her mother, Doreen, passed away in May, and her daughter has been grief-stricken ever since. It’s not the only tragedy to befall Parsons, who lost a child at Christmas in 1996.
Parsons says she’s had “a small spoonful” of the ashes most days and claims this is the only thing that will help her get through the first holiday without her mother.
“My mum and I had a really strong bond and one which could never be broken, even by death,” Debra said. “She has been the one who has helped me through all the other ups and downs of my life and then suddenly she just wasn’t there anymore. I was distraught.”
“I feel like she can live on by being inside of me because if she is part of me she can breathe through my body. My breath is her breath. It will be my first Christmas without her and I want her to be involved and this is the only way that feels right to me,” she continued.
Debra’s fiancé is supporting her decision, but her two sisters don’t know how to feel about this strange ritual.
While it’s certainly easy to balk at her decision, it’s clear that she is truly distraught after the loss of someone she loved so much. Before you judge, just remember that she is a person just like us, going through one of the hardest things a person could ever experience. I sincerely hope that she is able to muscle through this difficult season and start on a path to healing soon!